Alarming Stupidity…

It’s been the week of the stupid and the just plain dumb…

Most people come and go and pass through without you remembering them. Some stick in your memory because life would be so dull without them.
I remember years ago an old woman coming into the store with one of those tartan trolleys. She walks up to the manager and asks for batteries for her vibrator. The manager was lost for words at the thought of this little old lady using a rampant rabbit. He asked, what batteries does it take? She then proceeded to open the zip of the tartan trolley and reach inside. The manager started to stare into space like a not so rampant rabbit caught in the head lights. As she began to lift out the object, she revealed a large back massager!!! Poor man!!!

At work we try to sell a great many things. One of these is SKY HD. However, we can’t seem to do it. Imagine my surprise and Cheshire cat grin when a woman asked for SKY and all the channels. I was just about to rush off and get it arranged when she said. “Can I have it for a week?” WTF!!!

Also I had a woman ask me for a cable. I asked what cable would she like. She said, “I’d like a yellow one.” Nice!!!

Later in the week, one man asked me, pointing at the ticket saying £379.99, is that the price? No, it’s a random set of numbers generated to confuse the mentally insane. We have a small monkey in the back just to pull numbers out of a cardboard bed pan and place around the building.

A member of staff came up to me with a question about pay. It’s was a serious request and went something like this. Mark, can I get the same pay as a nurse who looks after the mentally sick… If I have to do it here, I should get paid the same. LMAO!!!

To top things off I got a call out today on my day off. One of my fellow managers forgot his key and everyone was waiting outside. Thank fuck I only live a short distance but having had a few drinks and a late night, I could have done without that.

I went for my ten yearly eye test today. I went along to Vision Express at Canary Wharf. I got a very friendly service and a detailed test. Results are that I’ve still got my greater than 20/20 vision and I’ve not got to go back for another 2 years. Here is a picture of my retinas…

Also today I had a Sushi lunch in Selfridges with Fleur and enjoyed the sunshine on Hyde Park.  Afterwards we had Tea in Fortnum and Masons which is a fantastic experience and very reasonable.

Only 3 days work left and then I’m on holiday…

Have a good weekend

M

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